Beachbum Berry's Grog Blog

MONKS + DRUNKS x SISTERHOOD = THE PAGO PAGO COCKTAIL

Posted on January 21st, 2008

chartreuse

“The ladies of LUPEC” may sound like the title of a Playboy pictorial set in a Czechoslovakian shtetl, but nothing could be further from the truth. That’s just how the group Ladies United For The Preservation Of Endangered Cocktails (LUPEC for short) refer to themselves. LUPEC is dedicated to “dismantling the patriarchy one cocktail at a time,” a goal which we’re all for: we applaud any excuse for a cocktail, and patriarchs have traditionally had little tolerance for beach bums.

We recently had the pleasure of meeting some members of LUPEC’s Boston chapter, who’ve named themselves after vintage cocktails invented by women — Fancy Brandy, Pinky Gonzalez, and Hanky Panky among them. Ms. Panky, alias Misty Kalkofen, is a former divinity student turned bartender. “As far as the divinity thing goes,” she says about her path from bible-thumping to cocktail-shaking, “I tell folks I make people see God every night!”

She’s also doing the Lord’s work as a proselytizer for Chartreuse, a grassy, herbalicious liqueur made by Carthusian monks. Chartreuse comes in two colors: the full-strength, 110-proof green, and the lower-proof yellow. Hanky Panky and her fellow LUPECians have incorporated Chartreuse into several intriguing original cocktails, notably a sour cherry concoction called the Can Can, and a show-stopping grapefruit and cucumber number named after Billy Wilder’s Irma La Douce (see link below for recipes).

Inspired by LUPEC Boston’s creations, we combed through our cocktail library in search of vintage tropical drinks that call for Chartreuse. In a 1940 book entitled The How And When, we finally found a good one: the Pago Pago. To make it, place 1 ounce of diced fresh pineapple in your cocktail shaker, then muddle the pineapple in 1/2 ounce fresh lime juice. Add 1/4 ounce white creme de cacao, 3 teaspoons green Chartreuse, and 1 1/2 ounces gold Puerto Rican rum. Shake well with ice cubes and strain into a cocktail glass.

LUPEC BOSTON

LUPEC CHARTREUSE RECIPES

THE STARBUCKS STOPS HERE

Posted on January 2nd, 2008

product bottle

It’s come to our attention that Starbucks has discontinued its cinnamon syrup and replaced it with something they call “Cinnamon Dolce” syrup. This will be a matter of abysmal indifference to you unless A) you are a fan of overpriced sweetened lattes, or B) you actually listened to us when we wrote in Sippin’ Safari that Starbucks’ cinnamon syrup works well in Don The Beachcomber recipes that call for the stuff.

Well, it doesn’t anymore: Starbucks’ new Cinnamon Dolce formulation will not just kill, but brutally murder any tropical drink it touches. So please uncap your blackest Sharpie and cross out the recommendation in your copy of Sippin’ (page 170, line 21).

The good news is, if you don’t care to make your own syrup you can still fall back on the cinnamon-infused sugar syrup made by Sonoma Syrup Company (pictured above). But going the home-made route is much cheaper: Simply crush 3 cinnamon sticks and place them in a saucepan with 1 cup sugar and 1 cup water. Bring to a boil, stirring until sugar is dissolved. Lower heat, cover saucepan, and simmer for 2 minutes. Remove saucepan from heat and, keeping it covered, let sit at least 2 hours before straining and bottling. It should keep about a month in the fridge.

AN EDUCATED THIRST: PROFESSOR JERRY THOMAS, REMIXED

Posted on December 14th, 2007

jerry thomas

Ever wonder where Don The Beachcomber and Trader Vic got the idea for their exotic drinks? We know they both traveled to the Caribbean, where they learned about the Daiquiri and the Planter’s Punch. But they also found inspiration right in their own back yard. In the 1830s, American saloons served a libation called the Sangaree; a hundred years later, one of Don The Beachcomber’s first drinks was called the Beachcomber’s Sangaree. Curacao was the most popular liqueur for topping off 19th-century American drinks; it also happened to be one of Trader Vic’s preferred flavoring agents, and a key ingredient in the Mai Tai. Both Don and Vic used a combination of rum and brandy as a drink base — Don in the Don’s Beach Planter, Vic in the Scorpion and Fog Cutter — a combination that can also be found in several American drink recipes of the Civil War era.

How did Vic and Don know about Sangarees, curacao floats, and rum-and-brandy bases? More to the point, how do we?

The answer to both those questions is Herbert Asbury. With a little luck, you will on occasion experience the thrill of discovering a writer whose interests and sensibilities mirror your own. The Beachbum has had that thrill reading only two historians: Alan Moorehead — who chronicled the European collision with Polynesia, Australia and Africa — and Asbury, a latter-day Virgil who guided his readers through the hellish underworlds of America’s nascent cities. We tumbled to him while browsing in an Anaheim used book store in the early 1990s; the jacket of the out-of-print volume, entitled The Barbary Coast, promised “an unflinching account of the sink-hole of depravity and vice that once made San Francisco’s underworld the most dangerous spot in America.” That’s exactly what the book delivered: In a swiftly paced, “you are there” journalistic style, Asbury resurrected a vanished era with details equally lurid and hilarious. We could smell the smoke and the sweat, taste the gin and the fear, feel the joys and the terrors of a past brought vividly to life; this wasn’t just reading, this was time-traveling. Asbury pulled no punches, and left nothing to the imagination. If he were writing in 2007, that would be no big deal … but The Barbary Coast was published in 1933.

We sought out Asbury’s other books about urban underworlds, all also long out of print: The French Quarter (1936), a salacious history of New Orleans; The Gangs Of New York (1928), even grittier than the Martin Scorsese movie it inspired; and Gem Of The Prairie (1940), which gave the same treatment to Chicago’s gangs.

A pattern emerged. In each of these books, one spectral presence — tonsorially resplendent and bejeweled with diamonds — haunted the pages that dealt with saloons and the rogues who “liquorized” in them. This larger-than-life figure somehow happened to be wherever the 19th-century action was: among the murderous barflies of San Francisco during the Gold Rush … amid the dandies hobnobbing in post-Civil War Manhattan’s opulent watering holes … presiding over a Chicago deadfall packed with pickpockets and pimps … or joining the beaver-hatted carpetbaggers sipping and scheming their way through the saloons of New Orleans.

He haunted those bars not as a customer, but as the bartender. Addressed by his clientele as Gambrinus or The Professor, his given name was Jerry Thomas (pictured above). He specialized in the forerunners of the Tiki Drink, concoctions known to 19th-century Americans as “Fancy Drinks.” Contrary to the myth that back then swells only ordered French champagne (known in Denver as “imported giggle soup”) and cowpokes only drank straight whiskey (variously referred to as Nose Paint, Coffin Varnish or Scorpion Bible, after a dram of which you “woke up feeling as if a cat had kittened in your mouth”), barflies both uncouth and couth availed themselves of a wide range of Fancy Drinks, and no one forced them to draw if they did. As Richard Erdoes wrote in his 1979 book Saloons Of The Old West, “Men who went in for fancy or mixed drinks were said to have an ‘educated thirst.’ Their tastes were respected as long as they were known as regular fellows who had proven themselves at work on horseback or with a pick below ground.”

According to an 1836 menu from the Merchant’s Hotel in New York, Fancy Drinks went by such names as the Franklin Peculiar, the Timberdoodle, and the Radiator Punch. These recipes have been lost to time, but many survived: proto-cocktails called Crustas, Cobblers, Daisies, Shrubs and Scaffas appeared as late as 1947 in Trader Vic’s Bartender’s Guide, although Vic booted most of them from his 1972 revised edition. “Once they were famous. Today they are passe,” he wrote then. “And you bartenders can forget them, too. If somebody comes in to you and asks for a Sangaree, you can probably figure that he wants to be a big dealer, and he has read about this thing in some book.”

David Wondrich is a big dealer, and he has read about this thing in some book.

That book is America’s first cocktail recipe guide, The Bon Vivant’s Companion, or How To Mix Drinks, written in 1862 by Jerry Thomas himself. Herbert Asbury rescued it from obscurity by re-printing it in 1928; before opening their own bars six years later, Don The Beachcomber and Trader Vic would almost certainly have read that edition. Fifteen years ago, we read it too … but we couldn’t make head or tail of the recipes. Inscrutable ingredients were measured in vague amounts, such as “one-half wineglass tincture of cloves.” What in blazes was “a wineglass”? Four ounces? Eight? And how the hell do you make a tincture of cloves, or find “a few drops essence of gentian,” or “one ounce snake-root,” or “one grain of ambergris,” or “six glasses of dissolved calf’s-foot jelly”? It was all too much for a Bum, so we consigned the book to a shelf of other texts we couldn’t comprehend, like Finnegan’s Wake or The Seven Habits Of Highly Successful People.

Enter Mr. Wondrich, the current drinks columnist for Esquire magazine and author of several cocktail recipe guides. He has done the impossible: After years of research, he’s standardized Thomas’s inscrutable measurements and found modern equivalents for all those archaic ingredients. Not only that, he’s field-tested The Professor’s recipes and presented the best of them in a fascinating new grimoire, Imbibe! From Absinthe Cocktail to Whiskey Smash, a Salute in Stories and Drinks to “Professor” Jerry Thomas, Pioneer of the American Bar.

Imbibe! not only brings Thomas’s repertoire back to life, it also delves into The Professor’s own life and times with a vigor, verve, and eye for the telling detail that would surely have pleased Asbury himself. It will most certainly please anyone with an interest in cocktail archeology, American history, or just a ripping good page-turner of a biography.

IMBIBE!

COCKTAILS ON CAMERA

Posted on December 5th, 2007

ssn logo

Over at the The Small Screen Network, drink expert Robert Hess has been performing an invaluable public service for tipplers everywhere. No, it’s not an online petition to put a restraining order between vodka and Red Bull. It’s even more valuable: He’s been hosting episodes of an online show, The Cocktail Spirit.

Part history lesson, part instructional video, and always absorbing, Hess guides viewers gently and sagely through the world of cocktail making and drinking. Fellow tropaholics will find posts on how to make such classic rum drinks as the Daiquiri, Mojito, and El Floridita; other posts offer a primer on bitters, tips on which bar tool to use with which recipe, and solid advice on how to stock your bar, as well as your cocktail library.

Our favorite posts have definitively detailed how to build two of our most beloved (and most abused by today’s bartenders) non-Tiki drinks, the Old Fashioned and the Sidecar. Now we have a new favorite post … because Mr. Hess has just added an interview he did with the Beachbum back in July. You’ll find it here:

THE COCKTAIL SPIRIT

PRAISE THE LORD AND POUR THE AMMUNITION

Posted on December 3rd, 2007

How’s Your Drink

Our familiarity with the world of high finance stops at hunting for change on the bar-room floor. Nevertheless, we always look forward to the weekend edition of the Wall Street Journal. Well, one page of it, anyway: Eric Felten’s column, “How’s Your Drink,” is a deconstruction of a different cocktail every week, garnished with well-researched historical anecdotes and drink lore. Now his columns have been collected into a book, How’s Your Drink? Cocktails, Culture, And The Art Of Drinking Well.

Our favorite chapter explains how to make a tropical drink we’ve been curious about since we first heard it referenced in old war movies and TV shows like McHale’s Navy. While U.S. Marines in the South Pacific fermented “Jungle Juice” using sugar and coconuts, the Navy fashioned its own home-brew by draining the alcohol-based fuel from submarine and P.T. boat torpedos, cleverly filtering out the toxic chemicals (most of them, anyway) by straining the fuel through a loaf of bread.

While Mr. Felten provides an alternate Torpedo Juice recipe that calls for gin, apple brandy, lemon juice and grenadine, we shall not rest until we get our hands on a topped-off torpedo and a day-old baguette.

HOW’S YOUR DRINK?

MORNING-AFTER MEDIA

Posted on December 3rd, 2007

morning after

Hung over? Butterflies in the opu? Seeing double? Then you probably shouldn’t try to read our recent New York Times profile, complete with vintage exotic drink recipes and one of our own originals (link below).

On the other hand, blurred vision shouldn’t stop you from listening to the December 1 edition of “Sidetrack,” Jason Croft’s NPR-affiliated radio interview show, which features a 20 minute interview with your humble Bum (also below).

NEW YORK TIMES BUM PROFILE

BUM RADIO INTERVIEW

BUMMIN’ IN BOSTON

Posted on November 11th, 2007

flyer

Sunday, November 18, Pho Republique will host a “Beantown Sippin’ Safari” featuring puu puus and four tropical drinks with a Boston theme, selected by yours truly. The Beachbum will be in attendance, serving up vintage exotic cocktails from such vanished Boston Tiki temples as Monte Proser’s Beachcomber, the Kon-Tiki, and Trader Vic’s, along with a slide show exploring Boston’s Tiki past.

Not enough to get you off the couch? Well, who can blame you? If we had a couch we’d stay on it too. That’s why this event also features Boston’s own Waitiki, who’ll play a live set of their unique jazz-flavored exotica, followed by DJ Brother Cleve spinning tasty vintage vinyl from his legendary collection. For more information, click the link below:

BEANTOWN SIPPIN’ SAFARI

COLD BUTTERED RUM

Posted on October 30th, 2007

ice shell

Lately, our fellow tropaholics have been expressing curiosity about the long-lost recipe for Don The Beachcomber’s Pearl Diver’s Punch, circa 1937, which we reveal for the first time anywhere in our latest book, Sippin’ Safari. The curiosity centers around one secret ingredient, which the Beachcomber called “pearl diver’s mix.” The mix calls for 1 part each honey and softened sweet butter, 1/8 part cinnamon syrup, and 1/16 part each vanilla syrup and pimento liqueur (details about these ingredients can be found on page 76 of Sippin’), all creamed together into a batter. At first sight, this batter would seem more at home in a Hot Buttered Rum than a cold drink like the Pearl Diver’s Punch. But when blended with the Pearl Diver’s other ingredients and a handful of crushed ice, then strained to keep the solids out of the drink, it makes for a mysteriously spicy cooler with a velvety mouth-feel unlike any other drink’s.

That is, until now. Exotic drink enthusiast Rick Stutz has come up with his own take on the Pearl Diver, which he calls KP’s Harpoon. (KP stands for Kaiser Penguin, the name of Rick’s popular cocktail blog.) He’s taken the Beachcomber’s basic Pearl Diver’s Punch template, rejiggered the rums for a smoother base flavor, replaced the orange juice with orange liqueur for extra body, and reduced the amount of batter for a more subtle end-note. If Don The Beachcomber is rolling in his grave, it’s just so he can reach his blender to make a KP’s Harpoon — it’s a lovely drink.

And here’s the recipe: Into your blender place 1/2 ounce each orange curacao and pearl diver’s mix; 3/4 ounce each light Puerto Rican rum, Demerara rum, and dark Jamaican rum; 1 ounce fresh lime juice; and 6 ounces crushed ice. Blend at high speed for 20 seconds, then strain through a fine-mesh wire sieve into a cocktail glass, pressing gently on solids to release all liquid into glass. (Discard solids.)

KAISER PENGUIN

SIPPIN’ SAFARI

BAD DRINKS IN GOOD BOOKS

Posted on October 28th, 2007

Beach Bums

Ever since the Beachbum was 86’d from his local library (apparently bunking overnight in the stacks is frowned upon … who knew?), he’s procured his books the same way he procures everything else: by beachcombing. Vacationers tend to leave their paperbacks behind when it’s time to head home, so we catch up on our reading after they’ve caught up on theirs.

Rummaging through a lifeguard station trash can, we found a title that really spoke to us: Drink Your Troubles Away, by John List. This 1967 volume turned out to be full of bad drink recipes — because the book wasn’t about cocktails, but about the benefit of drinking raw vegetable juices. No wonder it was in the garbage.

Thankfully, our next find was more booze-positive. Up In The Old Hotel, a collection of New Yorker staff writer Joseph Mitchell’s pieces from the 1930s to the 1960s, affectionately chronicled Manhattan’s demimonde of barflies, scofflaws, and goldbricks — in other words, our kind of people. Mitchell’s most infamous subject was one Professor Seagull, who cadged drinks for decades by convincing New Yorkers that giving him a handout meant contributing to the completion of his life’s work, a voluminous history of the world. When Mitchell finally got a peek at the never-finished manuscript, it turned out to be a lot of mad ravings. Professor Seagull may have been the king of the moochers, but the book’s sole drink recipe appears in a profile about the king of the gypsies. Cockeye Johnny Nikanov conducted his larcenous affairs from a couch in his lower East Side tenement, where he was habitually drunk by noon. Cockeye’s cocktail of choice was a recipe of his called Old Popskull: equal parts gin and Coca Cola. Don’t try it at home … or anywhere else, for that matter. It is truly horrible. Almost as horrible as the end that Cockeye met in 1944. “He overexerted himself carrying a watermelon home,” reported Mitchell, “and had a heart attack.”

We were stoked when we dug The Beach Bums out of the sand. But this 1959 paperback’s lurid cover illustration didn’t quite prepare us for the downbeat, surprisingly philosophical novel within. Author Jack Owen’s alter ego, Roger Anderson, flits from bar to bar and bed to bed in order to keep his existential ennui at bay. The bars include actual Hawaiian nightspots of the period, including the Moana Hotel’s Kamaaina Bar, Spence Weaver’s Gourmet restaurant, and Don The Beachcomber’s Dagger Bar. Roger’s on-again, off-again girlfriend, Bunny, is even a waitress at Don’s. So where do the bad drinks come in? Everywhere. In a book set during the heyday of the tropical drink, where every Waikiki bar Roger goes is famous for its mouth-watering exotic cocktails, this guy invariably orders a Martini or a double Scotch. So do all his drinking buddies. Martinis and double Scotches aren’t intrinsically bad, but they positively pale next to what these people could have been drinking. Finally, on the second-to-last page of the book, a character asks the question that was on our lips from page one: “What about Navy Grogs?”

James Jones wrote about Army grog in his 1977 meditation on WWII, entitled, oddly enough, WWII. Deprived of the cognac and chianti their fellow GIs were swigging in Europe, infantry units on Guadalcanal had to make their own home-brewed hooch. One popular recipe involved Aqua Velva aftershave and grapefruit juice, but Jones preferred a concoction called “swipe.” He reveals the recipe on page 122: “We made our ‘swipe’ by stealing a five-gallon tin of canned peaches or plums or pineapple from the nearest ration dump, and putting a double handful of sugar in it to help it ferment, and then leaving it out in the sun in the jungle with a piece of cheesecloth or mosquito netting over it to keep out the bugs.” The result was “the most godawful stuff to drink, sickly sweet and smelling very raunchy, but if you could get enough of it down and keep it down, it carried a wonderful wallop.”

Hmn … what are the odds of us beachcombing a can of peaches around here?

SOME SIRIUS DRINKING

Posted on September 30th, 2007

radio

– will occur between 2 and 2:30 p.m. this Wednesday, October 3, when the Bum will be making Mai Tais on the Martha Stewart Living Radio channel’s Living Today show, on Sirius Satellite. After we shake up a round, we’ll talk Tiki with host Karen Stewart. If you’re not a Sirius subscriber, you can get a free 3-day trial here:

SIRIUS RADIO